In my recent post, Sam told us that lack of affection can cause your partner to want to cheat or to have the thoughts. This is an undeniable fact, and it’s always important to find out how your spouse receives affection. But what do you do if your spouse wants to cheat? Do you even notice the signs?
I want to talk about flirting for a moment, because I’m convinced that flirting is the easiest lead into cheating. But first, here’s what Sam had to say about it:
Flirting with the opposite sex doesn’t always mean that there’s a plan/opportunity to cheat with the other party. It is just human nature and it makes the man or woman feel good about themselves.
Okay, so first I have to say that this is a mouthful. Very cut and dry. Wow. I cannot say I fully agree with this, but I do agree that it flirting makes one feel good about one’s self…especially if that one is a mama who normally feels pretty boring and frumpy. Every once in a while you wanna know that you still got it, right? I’ve had those moments where a man (in passing) would flirt and I’d think to myself, “Okay, so the mom jeans aren’t as lame as I thought they were.” It’s totally normal to enjoy having someone flirt with you, and perhaps, a one-time passer-by giving you a little attention is harmless. Perhaps. But what if it’s an ongoing thing? What if it’s the co-worker you see every single day and you are flirting with them? That is where I see a potential for cheating.
Giving decent people the benefit of the doubt, I’d like to believe that most people do not begin flirting with co-workers with the intention of cheating. It may even start by chance. A few clever comments and jokes, lunch out with a group of co-workers every so often, and before you know it, the relationship has gone from casual hello’s and smiles, to passionate looks and sneaking around. This type of thing can go from zero to fifty and it could take months or even years to notice that it’s gotten out of hand. The worst part is, when you are with your spouse, you might even begin to think about that person. You could begin neglecting your spouse and giving this co-worker all of your attention instead.
The emotional relationship is what leads to the sexual relationship. That’s what sparks the fire. You gain feelings for this person and, before you know it, you start seeing your spouse in a new light. All of a sudden they don’t measure up to this new person you’ve found. You start weighing your options; comparing one with the other and wondering what could be if you went the other way…and all of this started from “harmless flirting.” I’m no expert, but take it from me and refrain from flirting. You don’t have to avoid temptation if you don’t create a tempting situation in the first place.